Midnight And Lightening
by JennaGenociide
Summary: Twilight with a new twist! Edward has left Bella, and its been 7 months. But Bella? Not so sincere anymore. She has changed. Someone comes along. They've come a long way to patch her up together. To be happy again. What happens to her now? Please Review!
1. Chapter 1: Just Me

**Okay, so the names jenna. :p This is my first fanfic so like please review, and criticize me, so I can know my mistakes!!! I do not own Twilight, but I am going to add some characters of my own XD. PLEASE REVIEW!!! Will upload next chapter soon!!! Thanks and Enjoy!**

Chapter 1

Just Me

My daily routine: get up for school, wash, you know like brush your teeth and stuff, dress, go downstairs, stuff my ipod in my ears, grab my skateboard, and leave for school.

School: the most devastating part if my life. I don't really understand it. Why am I here? The people here are like aliens to me. People stare and point me out, always whispering "the walking dead of the insane," "the weird scene girl," or "the emo girl," but I guess you can say that I'm used to being different. I'm not like other girls, being your Paris Hilton wannabe. I like to have my own style. Be myself, trying not to care what other people think. I'm just me.

Sometimes, it just hurts to be me though. You know that feeling where you just want to let go of everything and breakdown? Yeah, I have many moments like that. You know that quote "stick and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me"? Yeah, that can impact someone's life if you really think about it. _I _thought about it, and can you possibly guess? It's not true. Words HURT.

While I am contemplating these little things that no one seems to notice, I see the view of school. Forks high school; my worst enemy. Here it comes: _whoosh; _the breath knocked out of me. Here it comes: the name calling and the staring. "Emo kid," a voice says. He has started the kids' tradition: bullying me, suffocating me with their cruel, evil words. "EMO PIECE OF SHIT!" a boy named Jonathan screams out to me. Him and his little football buddies crack up, laughing their heads off. One day though, I will be their misery, and they will pay for all they have done.

I try to ignore their vicious comments, tuning myself to my music. Comatose by Skillet. Memories overtake me, making my breathing irregular. A name comes to my mind: _Edward. _The person who lifted me up, patched my heart together, and just let me fall. It's been 7 months since our break-up. He left me, _he left me. _

How stupider can I have gotten? He gave me all the clues, all of them for me to suspect he'd be with _her. _

The memories, they pain me. I feel nauseous, like I am about to throw up. I can feel myself drain of color, going pale. I wrap my arms around myself for comfort. Help; I need help. I unravel myself from my arms and dig into my messenger bag. _Where is it? Where is it;_ those three words repeating themselves in my mind. _Found you. _I slowly look around me, everyone minding themselves. Now I look for a dark corner, where no one can find me, so I can be out of sight. I spot a corner and rush to it. I pull out the knife I so cherish, and cut. _Across, harder…harder…_my voice whispers to me. I see the blood trickle out of the cut, and I feel proud of myself. I cut more, more, more. I beg for more blood to be ooze out of the cuts I have made. Then I start with my right arms. Cut after cut. They make their own rhythm. _Enough _my mind tells me. I slowly stow away the knife in my messenger bag. I sit there and pick at scabs from previous cuts.

I look at my handy work, 7 cuts on each arm, all long and wide. My head is pounding, and I start to feel dizzy. Look at the blood makes me want to puke, so I do. I feel so faint, and then I feel something. Is it death? Or an angel? There's darkness ahead of me. I reach for it. I yearn for it. I hear a faint voice; so new and yet somewhat familiar.

"C'mon I've got you, I'm here for you. What is your name?" the voice says.

I realize it is a person, who is currently holding me tight, hugging me, and tending to me. I reply in the faint, whispery voice that I produce, "Bella…"


	2. Chapter 2: Evan

Chapter 2

Evan

Darkness, I feel it all around me. There is a door filled with light ahead of me. I reach out for it, but it's so far away. I pull my arms full-length, and it is still oh, so far away. Beeping, I hear beeping. It pounds in my ears. The beeping, make it stop! My head screams to me, begging, for the beeping to stop. My head throttles from the sound.

The voice, it replays through my head. "I'm here for you, I'm here for you," replays on and on in my pounding, aching head.

I feel a tug at my hand. It startles me. The tugging stopped, now turning into a gentle stroke. _Stroke, stroke, stroke. _My mind is overwhelmed at the touch. I start to hear low murmuring in the background. Who is there? Who is with me?

My mind tries so hard to force me awake. _Awake Bella, it's time to wake up,_ my mind whispers to me. Then the door filled with light starts to fade away. No! Come back, I scream, it is my escape!

I feel my hand twitch. My eyes flutter open. My head starts to ache even more as the beeping grows louder. What the fuck is it anyway? It's so goddamn annoying. Why the hell am I staring at a white wall? Why are there _tubes _in my arms?! Where the hell am I??

These questions and statements ponder through my head. I slowly lift myself off the cardboard-felt bed I noticed I was lying on. I turn slowly to my side and find a boy about my age staring intently at me while stroking my hand gently. I notice his piercing light blue-gray eyes witch make me gasp. I slowly inhale his beautiful features. He has a straight sharp-edged nose, with a piercing in it. His pink, plump lips with another piercing in it make me want to run my fingers across it. His coal black hair with one end sticking up and bangs that go across his face, covering his beautiful eyes.

I feel myself deeply blush, because I was staring at a stranger that I was sure I have never ever seen around in school. Was he from school? I ask myself.

"Where am I?" I here myself ask this beautiful person.

"In a hospital," the boy replies, in a deep, beautiful voice.

"Why am I here?" I ask bluntly.

"You cut yourself; you were losing so much blood. I couldn't just let you sit there in that dark corner, nearly dying, with throw-up at your side," he said so very quickly.

"Oh," I said. He was pretty straight-forward. He didn't even stumble upon his words, like he knew exactly what was going on in this dark, cold life I live.

"Why?" he asked quietly. I didn't reply, but turned my face away, feeling the tears well up in my eyes. I didn't want him to see me cry. Not already. We just met, I couldn't let him know. It's is too soon. I couldn't let him trip into my life so suddenly, revealing my secrets to him. I couldn't let him know about Edward, or how my mother and step-father had died in that horrible plane-crash. Or the way how my dad just abandoned me, not even giving me notice that he would leave. He said that he had gotten tired of sulking, and when things change and I "pull myself together" he _might _consider returning. I couldn't let him know how kids made fun of me, and I letting them do so, bowing down to the power they have, willing to do anything for them to stop. I couldn't let him know how I was such a disappointment to everyone, including the people I had most faith in. I couldn't let him know my secrets.

"I can't tell you," I whispered softly, "I just can't."

"I am here for you, Bella," he said gently, squeezing my hand.

"Get me out of here," I replied curtly. I would not let him stumble into my life.

"Okay," he said, "Just let me tell my mother where I am, so she won't think I am ditching on the first day of school. The principal might have already called her." He got up and shut the door behind him. I could see him pacing back and forth, quickly talking. He was so beautiful, I thought. He was tall, wearing a tight fitting black t-shirt and black skinny jeans along with black converse chucks. He was muscular in a way. Not jock muscular, but muscular in a way that would want you to run your hand up and down his arm.

"All done," he said, sitting down again in a chair next to my bed. "The nurses will come shortly," he said.

"What's your name?" I ask.

"Evan, my name is Evan," he replied. It was then I noticed there was a glint of sparkle in his eyes.


	3. Chapter 3: A New Path

Chapter 3

A New Path

_What am I doing here? _I asked myself repeatedly. Here I sat in this old beat-up ancient car, Evan in the driver's seat, I in the passenger seat, with music blaring. It was even a miracle that the CD player worked, it being old and beat-up stereo, and it being the best feature of the car. Know Your Enemy by Green Day was blasting from the speakers. Evan's head bobbing to the music and his fingers tapping against the steering wheel. I wanted to ask him where exactly we were going, but he seemed so intent in the music, I pushed the thought away.

Before I knew it, my head was bobbing along, I too loved this song. I was mouthing the words, while Evan was singing along. I was too scared to sing along; too scared to think if he would think I had a horrible voice. I played electric and acoustic guitar, I sang, but never in front of anyone. I was still looking for a band that needed another guitarist.

_Violence is an energy_

_From here to eternity_

_Violence is an energy_

_Silence is the enemy_

_So gimme gimme revolution_

_Do you know the enemy?_

_Do you know your enemy?_

_Well, gotta know the enemy_

Surprising myself, I started singing along with him. My voice wasn't as good as his, but I could feel myself smile, being proud of myself. He looked aghast, and then smiled at me, and we kept singing, wishing that this moment would last forever.

The song ended, and we were out of breath. We looked at each other and started laughing uncontrollably. It felt so good to be laughing for no reason at all for the first time in _ages. _**He **did that to me. I realized now that I could be perfectly happy without him. I mean if he could have fun with another person, so can I.

"So where exactly are we going?" I ask boldly, even prouder of myself for finding this new fact of being happy without _Edward._

"My house," Evan replied, clearly happy with himself.

"Your house," I repeated slowly, not really believing what he was saying.

"Yeah," he said as he stared questioningly at me.

"I could be a serial killer for all you know, and we've just met, you don't even know me, and you are taking me to your _house_?" I replied.

"You're not dangerous," he said, sounding so sure of himself, "and my Mom wants to meet you," he said now smiling to himself like a little child who has just received candy.

"M-m-meet your Mom?" I stammered.

"Yeah," he replied, looking happy with himself.

I needed to think and act quickly. I need an excuse, quickly. "Oh, umm, I think I'm feeling really tired right now, I think I need some rest and stuff," I said a little too quickly.

"Oh," he said looking really sad, "I just thought, you know, you could rest at my place, since you know, you're in no condition of going home alone."

I thought about what he said, and decided, that staying at his place and meeting his mother was the least I could do. I mean he did basically save my life. "Ok, maybe I could crash your place; I am in no condition returning home _alone._" I shuddered at the word alone.

"Are you cold?" he asked, and I nodded my head as in a reply. He handed me his black and white striped hoodie that was resting on the seats behind me. I pulled my arms in it and instantly felt warm. I could smell his scent, so magnificent. It smelled like soap and a faint hint of Axe cologne.

"Ok, we're here," he said about fifteen minutes later. He turned to face me. My eyes were drooping and I could feel sleep take over. "You ready?" he asked eagerly. I nodded in reply. A new path invited me in, and instantly I knew, happiness would come in the future. A change would happen. A change on how I would live now.

I got out of the car as he did, and he grasped my hand tightly. It was then I knew that he is here for me, and he came to change my life which wasn't so horrible anymore. A new light, a new path.


	4. Chapter 4: Music Is Life

**Hey Guys! I am so so so so sorry I didn't upload sooner! I have so many exams to study for and stuff. I am working on chapter 5 still. I was gonna upload it but I need to add a few things, well a lot of things, because I read over it, and decided it was BORING. So I decided to make it more exciting! Please forgive me. I will try my best to upload chapter 5 by tonight!!!! Thanks so much for your patience and your support!!! You guys give me so much confidence! Enjoy and Review!**

**--Jenna, xoxoxo-- **

Chapter 4

Music Is Life

As soon I entered Evans' house, I heard music blaring. The bass in the song was overtaking any social communication. My eyes open wide, my mouth open, and I stared aghast at the sight I was given. Only one word going through my head: _Woah. _In front of me was a world that was only music, music, music. There were guitars of all sorts everywhere, a drum kit in the corner, microphones lying upon the floor, and chords all over the place. Evan looked mortified.

He stammered, "I'm so sorry, we are still cleaning up the garage, this is a temporary place for band practice."

"It's okay," I said, in a voice that was clearly stating: Oh my God. This is awesome, I am in shock. This just Woah.

He took my hand and guided me over the mess of wonder. After getting through, we entered a door where I could see a girl with her feet on top of a coffee table and her hands strumming the armrest of her single-sofa. Evan strode over to the stereo that was blasting music, and turned down the volume.

"What the hell was that for?!" the girl screamed, "I was fucking listening to that!"

"Look at this Bitch-Ass-Bitch. Didn't Mom tell you that we have visitors over?" Evan said calmly, with a death stare set on his face.

"Fuck that bullshit, Music is **H O LY**, it is **L I F E," **she said emphasizing on the word music. "When people listen to _music_, they like to _enjoy_ it," she added.

Evan shot her a look saying: if you say another word, I'll fucking kill you. "Where's Mom, Nicole?" he asked quietly. She shrugged in response. "God, I swear, you are _useless,_" Evan said, and lead me to another room. I heard her mutter "Asshole" under her breath.

"Mom?!" Evan called out.

After a few times, a beautiful lady in her mid-thirties or forties came out of a room (I know, too many rooms) saying in a rush, "You don't have to yell, you can actually attempt to look for me, and oh, is this Bella? It's so nice to meet you." She shook my hand and smiled lovingly at me like I was part of her family. "You are welcome to make yourself comfortable anywhere," she added. I noticed that she was your typical rocker mom. Ripped jeans, a My Chemical Romance band t-shirt, an overdose of accessories and piercings. Evan was lucky to have this wonderful lady as a mother. If my mother saw me with the piercings I have currently, I think I would have been dead by now.

"Thank you so much, Mrs.…?" I said.

"The last name is Harrison, if Evan hasn't already told you, but call me Cassie," she told me.

"Oh, okay, thanks a lot Cassie." The name rolled off my tongue unfamiliarly, since I was not very used to calling adults, I would say, by their first name.

"C'mon," said Evan as he took me by the hand and lead me out of the room.

"Nice meeting you!" I shouted behind me.

"You too!" she called back.

I entered a room that was neat but also messy at the same time. It didn't even look like someone just moved in. The walls were covered with band posters, and there were CD's stacked up on the nightstand. There was a telecaster propped up against the wall, as well as an acoustic guitar. I also noticed an electric guitar, a microphone, an amp, and a bass guitar in the other corner.

"Are you in a band or something?" I asked curiously, because the looks of it, it seemed that yes, he is in a band.

"Yep," he replied proudly. "We're called Bleeding Wrists, but our former electric guitar player just bailed on us. He joined another band called The Captivated, who turns out to be our ex-rival, back in New York."

"You're from New York?" I ask, not really believing my ears.

"Yeah," he replied.

"But why would you move from New York to Forks, Washington. You don't really even have a chance here. New York is like your best opportunity to get signed!" I exclaimed.

"I know, but my mother wanted to move here. She told me that there was this one guy who would come check us out and he apparently lives in Port Angeles," he said doubting every word. "But, I guess now we need to find a new electric guitar player. Know any?" he asked.

"I umm, I play electric guitar," I confessed sheepishly.

"Really?" he said sounding excited. "You could join the band! Do you know how great this is?" and he kept going on and on, until he suddenly stopped rambling about things that could happen. "If you want to of course," his eyes probing mine.

"Of course," I told him smiling. "I've actually been looking for a band to play in for quite a while. There are a few, but they aren't really cliquing with me."

"This is great!" he said, and he gave me a huge hug. "One thing though. Music is life."


	5. Chapter 5: Restless Night

**I am so terribly sorry you guys!!! I didn't know it would take this long to update Chapter 5…)= I wish I could've done it sooner! I send my apologies, and I hope you guys enjoy this! I did change A LOT of chapter five, and I also added Evan's POV. I'm soo soo soo sorry still. **

**--Enjoy!!!**

**--xoxo, jenna**

Chapter 5

Restless Night

So here I was, lying down on the guest room bed, which happened to be more comfortable than my own. So many thoughts were running around my head. The hospital concerned me most. Maybe they contacted Dad or something and he might be on his way here. I didn't want Charlie in my life. He abandoned me. I won't let him come back. A phone call is acceptable. I can tolerate a phone call asking if I was okay, but for him to move back? No way, I'd rather die.

I heard a soft knock on the door. I stood up and opened it. There stood Evan in a t-shirt and shorts.

"Oh, I was just checking if you're still awake," he said blushing.

"Yep, I think I have a sleeping disorder growing on me," I replied.

"Really?" he asked.

"Nope, just playing around," I smiled.

"Oh, well if you can't sleep, wanna watch a movie or something?"

"Sure," I said. I wonder what kind of movies he watches. Horror? I think I would probably consider trying to go back to sleep. Let's get on with this my mind tells me. I follow him to the living room, which happens to be clean from the earlier mess. I settle down on the leather couch while he rummages through his collection of DVD's which I have to add, is a very, very big collection.

"Okay, so don't laugh or anything, but this happens to be one of my favorite movies." He said this as he placed the DVD into the DVD player.

"Umm…okay?" I replied curiously. He sat down next to me, and our legs were touching. He grabbed the remote control and fast-forward through the previews. The next thing you know, we're watching "The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants."

"This is one of your favorite movies?!" I exclaimed bursting out laughing.

"Hey, hey. Lay off the movie. It happens to be a very good movie which is also sad, but has a very good lesson behind it," he said defensively, holding up his hands.

"I see…" I said, laughing. Then we both looked at each other funny, and burst out laughing.

"Okay, okay. Watch movie," he said trying to control himself. I turned my full attention to the movie. Forty-six minutes later, I could feel myself growing tired. I don't know when, but I lay my head on Evan's shoulder and fell asleep.

_Evan's POV_

Here I was watching "The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants" with Bella. I felt a chill run up my spine as she laid her head on my shoulder. I looked down at her beautiful, breath-taking face. I saw that she was sleeping peacefully, with her mouth parted slightly. I sat there and let her lay her head upon my shoulder.

I was growing tired myself, but I stayed focus, paying full attention to the movie. This was a restless night, but I could not let myself fall asleep during this movie, as I had told her it was one of my favorite movies, and it was true. It is one of my favorite movies. After the movie finished, I grabbed the remote and shut the T.V. I didn't know what to do, because her head was on my shoulder. And I didn't want to shift my movement, because it would then probably startle her and wake her. Instead of moving, I put my chin on her forehead, a gesture claiming that she was _mine. All mine, _I thought to myself.

**--Morning--**

I woke up to murmurs and the smell of fresh coffee brewing. I rubbed my eyes with my hands and looked around me. Then I saw the most ridiculous thing: Bella talking in her sleep. We were sprawled on the couch, a blanket covering us, and she was laying on me. I never thought Bella would talk in her sleep. I chuckled to myself silently. I wish we could wake up every morning like this, but in a bed of our own, where she would wake me with the smell of coffee. She would follow _my _rules. She would obey _me. _And that is exactly what I have in mind; I will enforce this new plot in my head to become reality. She will never guess what happened, what hit her. After all, I am a charmer…_aren't I?_


	6. Chapter 6: My Black Dahlia

**Heyy guys!!! I just wanted to say thank you alott!! And thanks to my bestie Madina! Btw u guys, she's writing a story!! It's called **_**Dead Memories**_**, so please read it! The link is beloww!! Review!! And tell your friends that you think might be interested in my and my bestie's stories!! Thanks so much!**

**--xoxo--**

_**Dead Memories**_**: ****Edward leaves Bella but three months later Bella gets in a car accident and is changed into a vampire by a coven passing though. One problem: Bella head get hit in the accident and she loses her memory from when she arrives in Forks...**

**.net/s/5071710/1/**

Chapter 6

My Black Dahlia

**Bella's POV:**

_Seems like all we had is over now you left to rest.  
And your tears are dried up now; you just lay without a sound.  
Seems like all we had is over now, you left to rest.  
And my fears are over now; I can leave with my head down._

_I've , Lost it all, fell today, It's all the same  
I'm sorry oh  
I'm sorry no  
I've , been abused, I feel so used, because of you  
I'm sorry oh  
I'm sorry no._

Hollywood Undead streamed through my headphones of my ipod. Mixed emotions filled my heart. I could feel love, hate, anger, and hurt, swirling around me. _He left you; he left you there in the forest; _the words teasing me, suffocating me. They danced around me, slapping me hard in the face, repeatedly…repeatedly. I begged for it to stop. **Please! Leave me alone! Please, stop…don't do this to me, you are hurting me! **I said over and over, my hands thrashing at my face. My hands were failingly wildly above my head. My hands began to pound my head, and they worked on their own. Doing the job themselves. Pulling my hair to stop the mental pain. Crazed, alone, and defeated, I sat in the corner, crying. It was all I could do.

::cry/alone/cry/crazy/stupid/cry/hurt/cry::

::cry/cry/cry/cry/cry::

I wake up with a sudden fear, afraid that the pain will overrule me, take me into its tightening grip, and suffocate me until it does the deed I have longed for months: death. I look around myself wildly and I realize that I am still here, in Evan's house, on the couch. The events of yesterday swarmed through my head, stunning me, and bringing on a spur of the moment headache. I yawn as I get off the couch and groan to myself. My muscles ache as I stretch; I test my fingers as I move them, trying to get the blood circulating back.

I smell coffee brewing. The smell of coffee, for once, smells mouth-watering. My stomach growls to the smell, and I walk into the kitchen, embarrassed of myself. I must look disgusting. I smell probably, and I still have on the clothes from the day before. My hair must be wild, and I plead for an escape to go tame it.

Evan stood there against the island, lost in his world. He was holding his cup of coffee, and looking like he was contemplating something so deeply, nothing could shake off the feeling of being stuck in your own world daydream.

Suddenly behind me, I heard footsteps. Curses were streaming out of the mouth of the person.

"Hey, motherfucker, pass the goddamn pot of coffee. I _**NEED**_ caffeine," Nicole said, suddenly standing next to me and staring at Evan, who was still currently stuck in his world.

"HEY BITCH ASS BITCH; PASS THE GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING POT OF THE GODDAMN COFFEE. I NEED SOME GODDAMN COFFEE. I NEED GODDAMN CAFFEINE. _**NOW.**_ I DEMAND IT! GODDAMMIT!" she shouted, making me wince at the sound. Evan jumped at the sound, dropping the coffee pot in the act. We slowly watched the coffee pot fall and shatter to pieces. _Just like me, _I thought.

"Nicole!" Evan's Mom scolded, "look what you've done!"

"Oh, so now everything's _my _fault. How come _I _**always **get the blame for everything?! He was the one who was standing there, like a goddamn idiot, ignoring me! God!" she yelled as she stormed out of the kitchen. Her anger filled the the kitchen like a bad omen.

Evan was stammering apologies to his mother. He was sprawled on the floor, picking up pieces of glass off of the floor. Then, his mother put her hand upon his shoulder, and told him silently to leave the kitchen and get prepared for school. She reassured him that she would clean up the mess as he protested. Evan god up off the floor, and muttered a "good morning" as he strolled passed me, hanging his head.

"Good Morning, Bella. I'm so very, terribly sorry about this," Evan's mother said, looking apologetically at me.

"Good morning to you also. It's alright." I replied. "Thank you for everything," I said, remembering that I had to go back home to get cleaned and dressed, "I'll see you later, I guess. I have to stop by my house to get ready for school."

"Oh, okay. Just let me give you a ride," she said, grabbing her keys.

I could easily decline, but I didn't want to walk miles and be late for school. I followed her out the door. Instead of going in Evan's car, I was introduced to a shiny SUV that looked brand new. I opened the passenger door, and climbed in. the smell of new leather filled my nostrils reminding me of the Volvo I used to ride with Edward. _Edward. _I chose to let go of him, but why does he still run through my mind? I knew then, on the way to my house, that he would never leave me. He would haunt me forever, his soul running through my veins. For he would run through them for eternity.

_**Evan's POV:**_

I am such an idiot. I shouldn't have thought like that. I silently cursed myself. I could have something aloud. I could have said something, and Bella would've heard. _How can I be so stupid and ignorant of my surroundings?_

I heard the SUV rolling out of the driveway, and I strode to my window. I saw Bella in the passenger seat, and I stared at her. Her brows furrowed, and a frown pasted to her face.. she was clearly thinking of something that upset her. I wish I could wipe away that frown, and bring happiness to her eyes. I turned away from the window, and I started to prepare for school.


	7. Chapter 7: In The Shadows

**HEY GUYSS!!! I AM SO TERRiBLY SORRY I HAVEN'T UPDATED iN LiKE FOREVER. I HAD SO MANY EXAMS TO STUDY FOR, AND WHEN I FiNiSHED THAT, MY COMPUTER CRASHED!!! =( I THiNK THE ONLY GOOD THiNG ABOUT THiS iS THAT I PASSED EVERYTHiNG!!!! HOPE YOU ENJOY THiS CHAPTURR!!!!**

**--xoxo--**

Chapter 7

In The Shadows

_**Evans POV:**_

_I've been watching, I've been waiting_

_In the shadows for my time_

_I've been searching, I've been living_

_For tomorrows all my life_

_Lately, I've been walking, walking in circles_

_Watching, waiting for something_

_Feel me, touch me, heal me_

_Come take me higher_

Here I was, standing in front of the doors with "In The Shadows" by The Rasmus blasting from my ipod, blocking anyone from coming in until Bella arrived. People were giving me strange, curious, and death stares all at once. This moment was spiraling through my head, inserting a coming-on migraine through my head. I then stood on my tippy-toes and looked over the top of students' heads. It was then I saw her, walking slowly, and looking at her feet.

"BELLA!" I shouted. She looked up, and waved. Everyone turned their heads slowly, like in a movie. Some were in awe and shock. "Bella, I've been waiting for you." I said running up to her. People were rushing past me, going through the doors as if I would block them once more.

"Oh, ummm…thanks. You didn't have to block the doors though," she said looking at the rushing movement people look back at us.

I looked back, and replied, "Yeah, but oh well, I like to cause a scene." She looked at me and started laughing. Her laugh ran a chill down my back. I grinned like an idiot. "So I kind of need someone to show me around this school. I don't want to look like a lost loser on my second day of school. Technically, first, since yesterday I skipped." I said.

"Ummm…I really don't know anything around here. Only the rooms and places on my schedule," she said, looking sad for me. "Let me see your schedule, I might know some places."

I handed her my schedule. She looked at the piece of paper in awe. "You are in all of my classes. This is like impossible." She stared at the paper suspiciously as she handed it back to me. It took a lot of my energy to suppress back a smile. She was so _clueless. _She would never suspect me of taking her schedule. It was quite easy. She was sleeping and her backpack was _right there. _It was so tempting. I couldn't resist. It was much easier to be in all of her classes instead of trailing around her and meeting in-between. It made my needs and wants much easier to have. _**What would happen if she found out??!**_But she won't, because I didn't leave any traces for her to suspect me whatsoever.

"Lead the way," I said smiling to her. She gave me a small smile in return, turned around quite forcefully, and walked ahead of me hurriedly. I ran to catch up with her and it was then at that moment that I realized that she probably caught me red-handed. "Wait up," I said stepping into the same hurried stride as her.

She stopped abruptly and spun around angrily saying, "You arranged this didn't you?! You talked to the counselors and asked to be in the same classes as me, didn't you?!"

I winced at the stare on her face. It was a mixture of anger and hurt. "Look I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you at all. I just thought it would be cool if we were in the same classes and stuff. You're probably the only person here who understands me."

"Cool? Try freaky," she said as she glared at me. I hung my head and started to walk away. I knew this always made a girl come back running. In 4-3-2…

"Look, I'm sorry because of that outburst. I just…I just want you to be honest with me. I kinda freaked when I saw that you will be sitting in Edward's seat in biology." After she realized what she said, she put a hand over her mouth. "I should not have said that. I mean anyone can take someone's previous seat right?" she looked at me expectantly. I saw that pang of hurt in her eyes.

"I can switch my classes if you want," I said quietly. I wondered who this Edward was. All I could tell by the looks of it was that this person hurt her a lot.

"No, No. Its okay, I'm just overreacting. I just wish that you told me before-hand," she said, a sorry look pasted to her face.

"I know, I should I have told you. But look on the bright side, now you have someone to annoy the crap out of you," making a joke out of the whole situation.

"Joy," she said sarcastically as she groaned. She started walking again toward the building. "So we have English first period. The book we are currently reading is _Wuthering Heights. _Have you read it?" she said trying to make small talk.

"Nope," I said popping the "p", "I don't really enjoy the classics."

"What?!" she exclaimed. "How can you **not **enjoy the classics! This is unbelievable."

"I am terribly sorry that my interest in books are not very common with yours," I said as I walked away. I turned my head over my shoulder and saw her look at me in awe. I ran back to her side, flipped my hair and said, "Just Kidding." She tried to look at me irritably but failed to do so. She ended up bursting out laughing.

"Okay," she said chuckling to herself, "here we are. Building 3: English."

"Yippee!!" I exclaimed as we entered the building. I skipped down the halls and did a little dance. Then I struck a pose as in identifying myself as a "superstar." "See?? I am a superstar," I said smiling. She just shook her head and suppressed a smile.

"What on earth will I do with you?! Why me God?! Why ME!" she mocked in a sympathetic voice.

I pouted my lips and stuck my tongue out at her. "From now, you are getting the ST." **(Silent Treatment*)**

"Whatever," she said rolling her eyes and walked in the class. I trailed behind her.

"And you two are late because?" the English teacher said, her face showing that she is overly pissed. I looked over at Bella and I came to see that she was blushing and speechless. _A blusher and over-observant? This is going to make your job a lot harder Evan, _a voice in my head said.

"Oh, umm. I am new here. She was just guiding me to the right classroom Ms…?" I said boldly as people stare dumbfounded at us.

"Ms. Elaine to you. Have a seat. Both of you," she said irritably, and continued teaching her class. I grinned and Bella grinned back, blushing even more. I took a seat next to Bella and realized that this used to be Edwards seat. I would have to ask Bella about this Edward. He could so very easily get in my way. I turned my attention to Ms. Elaine and just at that moment, she threw a glare at me.

It was going to be a long day.


	8. Chapter 8: Ugly

**Heyy guyss!!!! Okay, turn around!! Maddie, you inspired me to write another chapter, which I was planning on doing tomorrow, but you are the miracle werkurrr. I would also like to thank Black Moon Falling, and of course, my bestie Maddie for all their support and their reviews!! Thanxxx so much you guys, I LOVE YOU BOTH!!! And as for the res t of you guys, thanxx so much too!! I wouldn't have gotten this far, your support and reviews lighten up my day!!! LOVE YOU ALL!!!!**

**--xoxo--**

Chapter 8:

Ugly

_**--Bella POV--**_

_Are you ugly? _

_A liar like me? _

_A user, a lost soul _

_Someone you don't know _

_Money, it's no cure _

_A sickness so pure _

_Are you like me? _

_Are you ugly? _

_We are dirt _

_We are alone _

_You know we're far from sober _

_We are fake _

_We are afraid _

_You know it's far from over _

_We are dirt _

_We are alone _

_You know we're far from sober _

_Look closer _

_Are you like me? _

_Are you ugly? _

Why me? Why, why, why?? Why did I have to be so ugly? I instantly vowed myself to make "Ugly" by The Exies my theme song every morning. The words screamed the truth. I was _ugly. _No wonder why **he **left me. I was plain and clumsy, and just not good enough for him. I would never be.

Memories came rushing back to me as I stared at the ugly girl in the mirror. _The reflection of me. _I was in the forest again.

"It will be as if I never existed." He said.

How could he say something like that? Did he not realize that I would _**never **_let him go. It was just impossible to let him go. _Impossible. _

I thought of all this while I was getting ready for another day of school. But now, now I have Evan. He made things a little better. Like yesterday, "Crank That" by Souldja Boy was streaming out of Mike Newton's car. He stood in front of Mike's car, blocking him from going any further path to go home. He stopped in the middle of the parking lot and starting dancing to the song. I didn't even know he could dance, he didn't seem like the type. Not to mention, he knew all the moves. He just broke out and started dancing.

I wasn't surprised when people started staring at him like he was an alien. Some people that is so natural that they stopped and danced along too.

I was surprised that I found myself laughing. A little too hard, in fact. His sense of humor just lightened up my day.

I smiled to myself as I stared at the ugly girl in the mirror. I stopped myself quickly as I even started. I could not feel hope for love or anything near it whatsoever. **He **did that to me. He was the person capable of me not loving anyone anymore. He took my heart away when he left me. I was dead inside, a dead girl that wanted life back. I wanted him to come back, and then everything would go back to the way it was. I would feel special. I would feel beautiful when he told me I was. I wouldn't be like this, full of hatred to myself, feeling ugly. _I am ugly._

Evan was going to pick me up today. He begged and pestured me until I finally gave in and said yes. After school I would go to his house and meet the band. They would play a few songs so I could get used to it, and soon after, I would join them.

I stared at the reflection of the ugly girl, and she to me. I turned away from the reflection and could feel its eyes on my back.

I quickly got dressed took a granola bar out of the cabinet, grabbed my backpack, and sat at the curb waiting for Evan. I missed my old red truck and the comfort of my skateboard already. I had a feeling that this was not only a one-time thing. I could sense that Evan and I would be good friends and I would start to have to get used to this.

I started to trace the number eight on my palm until I heard the sound of a wolf howling. The sound startled me and pulled me out of my daze. I looked around to find what caused the sound, but to the side of me were woods, to the other side a gravel road. I checked around me once more, just to assure myself that I was probably hallucinating the whole thing. The next thing I knew, Evan's car came in sight. I started to smile as I heard music involving a lot of screaming blaring through his speaker.

"Hey!!" he said smiling to me as I got into the passenger seat.

"Hi," I replied shyly, "whatsup?"

"Ahh, same old. Same old," he replied, "how about you?"

I shrugged in response. I looked out my window. He decided to take the long way to school. I let myself drown in the depth of the blaring music and the unspoken words we were afraid to speak. _I wasn't okay._

_**--Edward's POV--**_

__"Alice. Please. Just look for a little vision for me. I need to know she is safe."

"Yeah, how can she be safe if you just left her like that," she retorted in an angry voice.

"You know why I had to do it. I knew it was becoming dangerous to be around her since the incident with Victoria, who happens to be roaming out there, planning her next attack on Bella." I looked at Alice intently. She was blocking all her thoughts from me, and it started to aggravate me. I needed to know my precious Bella was at least safe. It was hard enough to deal day after day without her intoxicating presence around me. I want to die now. I need to have her by my side. I thought of going back, but I had to stay away from the thought to go back. I had to fight the urge, the raging fire, inside me. "Please Alice, please, I'm begging, just tell me if she's safe," I heard my voice break at the end, and I found myself dry sobbing.

Alice sighed a heavy sigh, and tried to look into the future. I focused on her thoughts and then I saw it. Bella was sitting in a beat-up old ancient car. She was with someone. A boy who looked very disturbing, a boy with piercings and shaggy hair. He wasn't the kind of people that Bella would normally hang out with. He was what they called a scene kid, or maybe and emo kid.

I tuned my focus back to Bella. She smiled and laughed at something the strange boy said, but her smile didn't reach her eyes like I used to see her smile. She turned her focus back out the window. I saw a dead look in her eyes. It pained me so, to see her like that. It hurt more to know that I was the cause of that pain. I felt like wiping that look off her face, I felt like caressing her, and making her smile.

She made a movement to move her hair out of her eyes, and then I saw it. I saw the scars on her wrists. Seven on each wrist. I knew what they represented. They represented how many months it has been since I left. I felt like dying from the sight.

I tuned out of Alice's mind and walked out of the room. I made my way to my own and slumped down in the corner. I saw how I was killing her. I saw how she looked dead, she got thinner. She dressed differently. She dressed like the dead, all in black. She was miserable, anyone would know that by just looking at her. And everyone would know that _I _was the reason for her pain.

I started dry sobbing again.

What have I done?

_**--Bella POV--**_

Somehow, I could feel Edward around me. I could sense him. I forbid myself to stop him spiraling through my thoughts. But I couldn't, I didn't have the power too. I knew somehow, he was watching over me now. Somewhere, somehow, he was.

Are you happy now?? You are killing me, Edward. Come back to me…please.


	9. Chapter 9: Shameless

**Hey guys. I'm so sorry I haven't updated lately. :/ I'm like really really pissed at the moment -.- YOU ALL KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!! Lol jk. I love mii fans ;) buh anyways. I make a vow at this moment I will **_**NOT give up**_** on this story. You all have mii word, and I stick to it :p. but this is one thing im totally serious about, and I wont disappoint any of you guys by stopping this story. IT WILL LIVE ON! You guys are the ones who I have kept me going, and I will still be going!!!**

**Love u guys!**

**--xoxo—**

Chapter 9

Shameless

_**--Edward's POV--**_

_Remember when you heard it, you didn't think about it  
_

_You opened up your ears and listened  
_

_Felt it smashing through the pretense, through scabs of inhibition  
_

_That the world stitched to your shoulder like a mission  
_

_It echoed like lips meeting and it fluctuated violently  
_

_Filled your heart and lungs up with redemption  
_

_Kind of like an ending but more like a beginning  
_

_And even though you're losing then you're winning  
_

_If you say oh  
_

_Remember this forever  
_

_All that matters is a song  
_

_Singing "I will be with you  
_

_Everywhere you go  
_

_Every little thing you do  
_

_Our love is here to stay  
_

_Even when the skies are gray  
_

_Even when I'm away  
_

_I'll be with you."_

_  
_My heart was aching as I listened to "Shameless" by Say Anything. It has been from the start I had left Bella that day in the forest. I yearned for her love. I missed the way she was so worrisome. The way she made clumsy look cute. Her soft, caring, brown chocolate eyes, I yearned so just to look deep in the depths of them. I need her to know that I still love her, and I still want her.

What have I done? What have I done? How could I have let this happen? The voice in my head screams at me: _Look what you've done to her. Look at what you've made her become. It's all your fault and you know it. You have __**RUINED **__her._

I want to make this right so bad. I craved her soft skin, and the blush that creeps up her neck at a simple compliment,

Oh, Bella. I yearn for you so.

_**--Bella's POV--**_

No one really asked my opinion on school, but here I am giving it to you: I hate it. It really sucks balls.

Lets take today for an instance. Jessica comes up to me, acting like she was still my friend. After all these months, you would have thought a good friend would stick by your side, but she gave up on me. A good friend _never _gives up on you. But she did. She did. I'm getting off topic, but so I was just walking to class, trying to stay invisible as much as I can, and she walks up next to me. This is how the conversation goes:

"_Hey," Jessica says._

"_Hey," I mumble back._

"_So what's up?" she says good-naturedly._

"_Nothing," I reply, looking down at the floor._

"_So like, I just wanted to talk to you about that new kid. What's his face?"_

"_Evan."_

"_Yea him. Well I just wanted to say, well not me but me and Angela, and Micheal, we don't think he's all that healthy for you. I mean, he's nothing but trouble. I mean, just he's just, trouble."_

"_Why? So I can be alone? You guys are the ones who just left me here. At least he tends to care about me. You guys don't even know him. He's actually a really sweet guy."_

"_Bella, did you seriously think we just left you? Like seriously, you are the one who ignored us."_

"_I IGNORED YOU?! Oh my God, are you seriously freaking kidding me? Friends don't give up on each other when they're sad, or need help."_

"_Look, Edward left you, why can't you accept that? He was a great guy, sure, but seriously get a grip on yourself. Other guys would __**kill **__to be with you."_

"_I love him! Oh wait—you have never experienced anything like that."_

"_Excuse me? Bella just hold it there, you don't even know what you're talking about."_

_I laughed hysterically. "No Jessica. You don't know what you're talking about. Just go away from me! You went out of my life a long time ago, and now you suddenly want to re-enter. Just go away!" I said screaming at her as I ran away._

"_Bella—Bella! Wait!" she said, grabbing my shirt sleeve and letting it slip out of her hand._

_The last thing I heard was Evan say to her "Let her go."_

Here I am sitting on my bed, crying as I think about the incident. I had acted so foolish. Why had I said those things to her? She was right. I ignored them, ignored the comfort they had offered me, and now I won't ever be able to get it.

The question I feared to be true was annoying. Like a little reminder at the back of my mind, telling me that it could be so true.

Is Evan really trouble?

_**--Evan's POV--**_

__I lay on my bad feeling a little sick. The revolting taste of vomit at the back of my throat made my stomach churn. How much do Jessica and her little group of friends know? They don't know anything. She was right on target, I am trouble. But I'm not _that _bad. I mean, I just want Bella to love me like she loves that Edward.

Jessica and her friends know nothing of my past. Maybe I'm just over-reacting. I will make sure they don't find out a single thing. I will see to it. It's a vow now made to myself, and they will NOT find out. _Ever._

_a/n: I'm sorry if this chapter isn't as good. I had a really hard time writing it. I was in a rush, and I changed a lot of things. I'm sorry if it has a lot of grammar mistakes :/ Enjoy&&Review!!! Thanks&&I'll try to update soon!!_

_--xoxo--_

_Those of you who have read Dead Memories, by my friend Madina, I MIGHT continue it. I e-mailed her about it, and am waiting for her approval! So I'll say if I will continue it by next chapter or not!!!_


	10. Chapter 10: This Love You Breathe

**Hey guys.**

**I am really sorry since I haven't updated. I have been just going through so many things, it's a miracle really that I am writing at the moment. Two people have inspired me, Black Moon Falling, You go girl! Everyone read her new story: Left Bleeding. It soooo good! I am addicted to it :p Summary Below! I have to admit, Madina, you have inspired me to write. I wanted to thank you for everything too. I think you know what I am talking about. This chapter is dedicated to you. =)**

_**Left Bleeding: **_**Bella was never the human she pretended to be. She had darker life- one that follows her wherever she goes. When it finds her in her new life, will she keep living her life in a lie? Or will she return to the darkness to save the ones she loves?**

**.net/s/5198675/1/Left_Bleeding**

Chapter 10

This Love You Breathe

_**--Bella POV--**_

Nerves were pounding themselves into my blood. They were running through my veins like wild fire. This was my first band practice. I was waiting in Evan's living room for the others to arrive. They just arrived from New York and I was waiting for Evan to come back from the airport. I was thinking madly. The thoughts in my head weren't circulating quite correctly. _What if they don't like me? _Those six words were stamped to my forehead, never leaving me.

I had stayed up all night memorizing the lyrics to the song we were going to cover. Evan said I wasn't ready to perform a written song. The song wasn't familiar to me. I had never heard of the band Eyes Set To Kill, let alone the song _This Love You Breathe _by them. I was going to be a backup singer.

I heard the lock on the door click, and came to see a group of people shuffle through the door, Evan being among them.

"Home Sweet Home!" a girl who was wearing insanely bright clothing shouted. She would easily be classified as a "scene" at school. The other people, all of them boys, started laughing.

Evan didn't laugh along, but instead rolled his eyes while saying, "that there, that thing, is Veronica."

"You take that back sir! I am not a thing, but forevermore a human being! And if I need to remind you I play guitar and am lead vocals for _your _band. So shut up!" she declared holding her fist in his face. With her bangs out of her face for just a minute, you could see she was stunningly beautiful, even with piercings in her nose, lips, and eyebrow. She was wearing neon green and blue pants with chains, and a drop-dead t-shirt. She aimed a punch but Evan just laughed and ducked her punch.

A tall, lanky boy, wearing nothing but black and white, said, "I'm Drake. I am the drummer" He flipped his blonde and black bangs out of his eyes and gave me a warm smile. He had lots of piercings and many chains hanging from his studded skinny jeans, matching it with a tight lung t-shirt.

Another boy who was also tall and lanky said, "I'm Aiden. I play keyboard" He was typing away into his sidekick, never lifting his eyes from it. He was dressed in black skinny jeans, with chains, and a drop-dead t-shirt.

Then out of nowhere, another boy piped up and said, "I'm Ash. I am basically your screamer. I'm vocals with Veronica. He could also be classified as a "scene." He was wearing yellow skinny jeans, and a drop-dead monster t-shirt. He too had piercings. Everyone had piercings in this room, including I, as Evan took me to the piercing/tattoo parlour a few days back. I now had snake bites, a nasal septum piercing, and a bridge piercing.

There was one other boy, but he stayed in the corner. He was dressed in black from head to toe. Evan looked over to him and said, "That's Zach. He doesn't talk much. He plays bass. Anyways, everyone this is Bella. She is now a backup singer and she plays electric guitar." I gave them a small smile and a wave. I could comfortable with this people, for they would be my new family.

"Alright, intro over. Let's get to work," Evan said.

"Yessir," said Veronica as she saluted him. She tried to keep a straight face, but instead fell to the floor laughing. And here I was, grinning like an idiot.

We filed into the next room, with all our equipment. Everyone started to sound check and make sure everything was working properly.

I hooked my guitar to an amp and made sure it was in tune while Evan was saying, "So remember Bella, just like we practiced, not E/C/E all the way through, once Veronica and the others play, during the bridges you switch from E/C/E to E/C/D."

"Okay," I replied, making a mental note not to forget.

"1,2—1,2,3,4!" Drake shouted, and after a moment, Ash starting screaming the lyrics **(Ash screams all lyrics in paranthesis)**:

_(Blackout memories of you_

_I'll take, slowly I shall take_

_I will I'll slice you open_

_I'll steal back my love)_

_Revenge is running through my body_

_(This love you breathe)_

_So fast racing against my heartbeat_

_(This love you breathe)_

"_Escaping letting my tension free—_Wait. Stop! Everyone stop!" Veronica shouts.

"Dude, bummer," Drake said.

"What did we have to stop for," Evan said, kind of annoyed.

"I am not feeling anything from Bella," she replied. She walked up to me. "Are you nervous?" she asked me. I nodded my head. "Don't worry about how you will sound, let go of the nerves. You're just a back up, it'll be alright I swear. Everyone's always nervous their first time. Just think that you're the only one in the room, and just sing your heart out." She looked at me expectantly. I knew her intention wasn't bad, but good. She was giving me advice. "Okay?" she asked.

"Okay."

"Alrighty. Back to formation my lovers!" she shouted. Everyone laughed in response.

"1,2,3,4!" Drake shouted once more, and again Ash screamed the lyrics:

_(Blackout memories of you_

_I'll take, slowly I shall take_

_I will I'll slice you open_

_I'll steal back my love)_

_Revenge is running through my body_

_(This love you breathe)_

_So fast racing against my heartbeat_

_(This love you breathe)_

_Escaping letting my tension free_

_(This love you breathe)_

_Scent of your blood smells so sweet_

_Your lungs will swell till' your choking on your fear_

_Your lungs they'll swell till your choking_

_Your lungs will swell till' your choking on your fear_

_Your lungs they'll swell till your choking_

_(Trade me my love for this heart I pray upon_

_Trade me my heart for this heart I pray upon_

_Revenge)_

_Blackout the memories of you_

_I'll take all life from you_

_I'll slice you open so you feel the pain from you_

_I'll slice you open and steal back my love from you_

_Steal back my love from you_

_Steal back my love_

_(This love you breathe_

_This love you breathe_

_This love you breathe_

_This love you, this love you breathe._

_This love you breathe_

_This love you breathe_

_This love you breathe_

_This love you, this love you breathe)_

"Oh my God, guys she did it! Bella you did it!" Veronica screamed excitedly. She ran up to me and hugged me. She reminded me of when Alice was cheery.

Evan gave me a giant hug and whispered in my ear, "I knew you could do it." He pulled back and smiled at me.

"Bravo! Bravo! Marvelous my dear children, we indeed have inherited a quick learner!" Drake said.

I was smiling and I looked around once more. This was my new family.


	11. Chapter 11: Move Along

**Hiya! This chapter might most likely suck )= I had no idea what to write about. I'm totally blacked out. In other words, I'm stuck!!! )= I know my whole plot and everything, I just don't know how to get there!!! And I don't want to end the story early, making it less than 20 chapterss. UGH—lol. Buh anyways, I hope you guys like this chapter. Review!!!**

**--xoxo;jennerss--**

Chapter 11:

Move Along

_**--Edward's POV--**_

_Speak to me, when all you got to keep is strong _

_Move along, move along like I know you do _

_And even when your hope is gone _

_Move along, move along just to make it through _

_Move along _

_Move along _

_So a day when you've lost yourself completely _

_Could be a night when your life ends _

_Such a heart that will lead you to deceiving _

_All the pain held in your _

_Hands are shaking cold _

_Your hands are mine to hold _

My hand flew across the page as if it weren't fast enough to write these words, they would be forgotten. This is utterly insane. No man should be keeping a journal. This idea of my 'therapist' has officially deflated half of my ego. Alice should find a different therapeutic technique that will wash away this pain pumping through my dead body.

Alice would be furious with me, I knew that for sure. I bet she saw me writing these words down. These words that express the hatred I feel for her at this moment. It was a wonder why she didn't stop me. I tuned into her thoughts to figure out why. She saw this coming, and in an instant she thought: _You'll thank me later for this, don't worry. And in the end, you will apologize and take me on a huge shopping spree. _

She must have been crazy if she thought I was going to thank her for _this. _This is probably one of the most humiliating things I've done in my whole entire life. I sighed with frustration. _Why Me? Why Me? _running through my head endlessly. The day I left her was the biggest mistake I have made. I need her. Without her, my heart is gone. All I can do is sulk around, hating myself for the pain I have inflicted on her as well as myself.

Without her next to me, I shall simply die. It's my only option _left. _No matter the words pouring out of my earphones, the words to "Move Along" by The All-American Rejects making so much sense, I just simply can't move along. I am stuck, and only have thatone option.

_**--Alex's POV--**_

__I am furious. How can she not realize the hints I have been leaving around.

_(Blackout memories of you_

_I'll take, slowly I shall take_

_I will I'll slice you open_

_I'll steal back my love)_

Hint hint: I'll steal back my love. She surely should have realized that I picked this song for a reason for band practice. She simply can't be as lightheaded as they say she is. She will steal back her love from _Edward. _And soon, her love will be mine forever.

_**--Bella's POV--**_

I was exhausted. From school, band, and the pain I feel inside. The pressure of it all heavily weighing down my shoulders.

"Edward, I need you" I whisper into the night as I look at my window, knowing he'll never hear me, to never come back to hear me say the three words I want to say to him to make him mine once more: I love you.

The tears slowly run down my face. Will it always be this difficult?

_**--Alice's POV--**_

I felt even sadder than I already am. I slowly erased the vision I just emerged from. The tears rolling down her face, the three words slowly leaving her mouth, I couldn't just let this happen to the two of them. Their hearts are crushed into pieces. He clearly can't live without her, as so as she. They are forever to be soul-mates. He has half a heart, and she has the other half.

How will I put both of those halves together and make it one once more?


	12. IMPORTANT!

_**Hey guys…**_

_**Sorry I haven't updated on my story for a while. I know you guys were expecting a chapter, but I am sorry this isn't **__****__** okay. So now, you guys probably just closed this after that sentence, but please those of you who didn't, read on, because I can explain!**_

_**So, I have been pretty busy lately. So many bad things have been happening to me. I can't really say what is happening, because it's kind of personal, but it has brought me down big time.**_

_**I have been busy with work and helping my little brother and little sister get ready for school; they start on Monday. I have been going from places to places buying specific things for their school (it's listed on the school supply list, so I have no reason to actually complain) in between work. I also had to help my little brother on this stupid math packet the school sent in the mail, which consists of at least forty pages problems. The thing that bothers me, is that they sent it in the middle of summer. That's not really you know, like good if they give homework on a break. I mean its called summer break. They put break in their for a reason.**_

_**I am pretty sad though about this story. I haven't been getting many reviews **__****__** I thought maybe as I write the story, it would grow at least a little more popular, but it hasn't. Plus, I get less and less reviews for each chapter, which puts me in the mood of not writing. But I did promise that I would not give up on this story, therefore, I WILL NOT. Also, I am making a promise that you guys will have a new chapter by Wednesday or Thursday!!! I will try to make it as long as possible to make up for my absence ;-)**_

_**So, that's it really. I would like to thank everyone who has read, reviewed, favorited my story, put me as their favorite author, and added my story to their alert list!! You guys are great, and are the only reasons I keep it going! Love you all!!**_

_**Oh and I have a favor to ask you guys!!! If you can or want to, that is! Please, please inform others about my story!!! Tell your friends, everyone you know who loves twilight and likes to read fanfics, please tell them!!! It would be much appreciated!!!**_

_**Thanks soooo much!!!**_

_**--hugs&&kisses booboo's!!! XOXOXO;;jenners--**_


	13. Chapter 12: I Wanna

**Hey everyone;**

**I just want to say thank you all sooo much for supporting me. You do not know how grateful I am to have all your support. I am still so very sorry this story is late. Forgive me! Thanks once again for your support. I would also like to thank all of you guys who told other s about my story. I am now realizing that it doesn't really matter how many people read my story, just that I enjoy the writing. And all of those who found those people who founded this story, maybe they were the only ones meant to read it, you know?? But anyways, I still want to thank you!!! Ahhh, I am talking way too much, lets get on with the story, shall we??**

**--xoxo, jenners ferrevurr—**

Chapter 12:

I Wanna

_**--Evan's POV--**_

I stood in front of her door nervously in my pj's. They happen to be very comfortable. I was still contemplating on whether I should knock on the door, or just turn around and go back home. It is the middle of the night, and I just—I just, I don't know. I just woke up and felt that I needed to come here. Like I got a telepathy from God or something, telling go to Bella…NOW!!

I chuckled to myself as I thought this. How weirder can I get? Don't get me wrong, I mean I'm not messed up. I'm just a guy who gets transfixed on something, and works hard until he gets it. And when I get transfixed, it means I want something. And I will end making it mine. I always get what I want. _Always. _

Enough of my needs, and back to my contemplating. Should I go in? Should I leave? Dammit!!! Why can't I just make up my damn mind? Where is all the telepathy messages God? Send me another one.

Before I could keep arguing with myself, I found myself raising my arms and knocking on the wooden door. It was like my arm had a mind of its own. I looked at my arm in confusedly and waited for someone to answer the door. I waited for two minutes and realized no one was home or she could be asleep. As I turned around to head back to my car, I heard footsteps behind that wooden door. I stopped in my tracks, turned around, and put a serious face on. The next thing you know, Bella answers the door. She looks like hell, I thought to myself. There were dark circles under her eyes, not to mention poofy…really poofy, hair tousled, and pale. Too pale, I thought.

"Ummm, can I help you? You do realize it's about two in the morning and people like to enjoy their sleep?" she said in a tired voice.

"Sorry Bella, I just felt that I needed to come here," I replied.

"Evan, what are you—why are you here?" she said, now nearly entirely awake.

"Like I said, I felt that I needed to come here. I think I got a message from God." I said, grinning.

"Uh huh. Just get it in, I'm tired. I'm going to go to sleep, and you can help yourself to anything. I don't feel like being polite right now especially to people who wake me up in the middle of the night just because they think they got a message from God, which is not possible, in my theory," she said groggily. She turned around and started up the stairs.

"Oh and if you're gonna crash here, Charlie's room is available. It's up here, just keep going straight, door on the right," she said over her shoulder.

I was sad that she would ignore me this way. I understood tht its two in the morning, but I mean the least someone can do is respect their visitors. Whatever, I'll take what I can get.

I stepped inside the house and looked around me. I wasn't here to grope around. I would not help myself to anything. I went straight upstairs and went to Bella's room. Do not ask how I know which is hers. That is for me to know, and you to find out.

"Go away," she mumbled, pulling a pillow over her head.

I ignored this and climbed into her bed.

"What the fu—what the hell do you think you're doing?" she asked, sitting straight up.

"Making myself comfortable," I replied.

She grumbled to herself, and turned to the other side and said, "Touch this side of the bed and you're dead. I am included with this compromise."

I sighed, and just slowly wrapped my arms around her waist. I felt her go stiff. I quickly withdrew them. _You're moving way too fast, _I said to myself.

The next thing you know, Bella is asleep, and moving wildly. She started saying the most absurd things. I could tell she was in a deep sleep, so I once more pulled her into my arms, and the moving and talking stopped. I looked down upon her face to see if she had woken, but she hadn't. She looked peaceful now. I didn't let go, and as I fell asleep, I could hear the song "I wanna" by The All-American Rejects pound through my veins. I knew the words to the song were so true.

_I wanna, I wanna, I wanna touch you_

_you wanna touch me too_

_Everyday, but all I have is time_

_Our love's the perfect crime_

_I wanna, I wanna, I wanna touch you_

_you wanna touch me too_

_every way and when they set me free_

_Just put your hands on me_

_**a/n: New chapter tomorrow!!! I promise/ pinky swear it!!! –jenners—**_


	14. Chapter 13: Daydream

**--Sorry I didn't update Friday; my computer just stopped working on me. Great timing, huh? I had the chapter written, just didn't get to update it…sorry!**

**Hey!!!**

**So, I did pinky swear that I would write another chapter, and VIOLA!! POOF! It's here!! But anyways, I'll try to update faster than I usually do. Once everything settles down, then I will be back on track =) But here ya go! I really need to work on my talking skills, sometimes I just blabber and blabber. There it is again…*sighs* I'll shut up now!**

**P.S.: I was going to use a different song for this chapter because to be honest, I don't like Avril Lavinge (WHY THE FUCK AM I USING HER SONG?!) but…I got my ipod taken away (bummer right?) and I couldn't think of a song to go with the chapter, so yea. Sorry it sucks.**

**--xoxo;;jenners--**

Chapter 13:

Daydream

_**--Bella's POV--**_

I headed upstairs, leaving Evan waiting at the door. Why is he here? It is two in the morning and he is at my front door, in his pj's. Why? Why? Why? I don't know. Life throws too many unexpected things at you. Doesn't that sound so freakin' familiar?

I crawled into my bead and closed my eyes. As I started to enter a place where I was too familiar with, I felt the mattress deflate to a lower level. I sighed with frustration. Evan apparently needs a cuddle bear. Well, I am definitely not going to be his.

"What the fu—what the hell do you think you're doing?" I asked, sitting straight up.

"Making myself comfortable," he replied.

I grumbled to myself, and turned to the other side and said, "Touch this side of the bed and you're dead. I am included with this compromise."

He sighed in reply. The next thing you know he has his arms wrapped my around my waist. I went stiff. _Who does he think he his? Does he not realize what he's doing? _I asked myself. He quickly withdrew them, and kept a sigh of relief to myself.

I closed my eyes and entered that familiar place.

_"It'll be as if I never existed," he said, he kissed my forehead and left._

_Those seven words swirled around in my head over and over. I ran and ran, tears streaming down my face. I fall down, embracing the wet leaves._

_"Bella?" someone said in a whispery voice._

_"Bella," they repeated once more. "I'm so sorry," he said shakily. I felt cold arms wrap around my waist. This is how it's supposed to be. _

"_I love you, Edward," I said._

"_I love you, too," he replied._

_All was good, and everything else forgotten. Like the pain was never there. Like he never left. My theme song: "Daydream" by Avril Lavigne._

_Your my _

_Day-dream _

_You know that I've been thinking about you _

_Late-ly _

_And every time I look at you I _

_Can't explain feel insane _

_I could fly away _

_You're my _

_Day-dream _

**--Morning**

The dream subsided. I woke with someone stirring next to me. Events from last night flooded back to me. I looked over and saw Evan sleeping soundly. He looked different when he slept. Like an angel, I thought. He was just…beautiful.

I hurriedly climbed out of the bed. What am I doing? This isn't supposed to be happening. I am not supposed to have another person in bed with me. I know I didn't sleep with him, but he being in my bed is close. I am getting too attached. I am still supposed to be mourning for my loss: Edward.

But what if this is it? What if this is supposed to be the next step, the next step from mourning? Moving on. Is this it? Am I finally getting over him? Is this the part where I fall madly in love with my possible new best friend?

I know I won't ever fall in love with Evan, because that is impossible. I love Edward, and that's that. I heard a knock at the door. I go downstairs and answer it. I must look like hell, but who cares? Don't I look like that all the time now?

I open the door and was surprised with who was at the door.

"Hey, Bella," Jacob Black said casually. He gave me a look-over and said, "You like…nice? Did I wake you?" he said withholding a laugh.

"Jacob!" I said with astonishment. I wrapped my arms around him and breathed his scent in. He always smelled good.

"Easy," he said laughing. "I came up here to check on you. I haven't seen you since-- how are you?" he said now looking down at me. He must have grown like a million inches since the last time I saw him.

"Okay, I guess. Please, come in." I said. "Do you want anything to drink or eat or something?"

"Nah, I ate already. But I was wondering, do you maybe want to hang out today?"

"Sure," I replied. I think this is what they call moving on.

_**--Edward's POV--**_

I sat back furiously. I was fuming. I pounded my fist on the desk. In the next moment, I heard a crack, following the desk breaking into two.

"I will rip him to pieces if he ever touches her again," I said through gritted teeth.

"It is your own fault you left her. What did you expect? If you think she's going to mourn and wait for you, you must be out of your mind. Buddy, she's tired of waiting. She's finally moving on," I heard Rosalie say.

"Shut up, Rosalie," I snapped.

"Hey, cool it man," Emmet said with a warning glance as he wrapped his arms around Rosalie's waist.

"Edward," Esme said, "it'll be okay. The boy might be protecting her. If he does harm her, she will always have Jacob around. Furthermore, Alice has visions. We can always deal with it also."

I looked over at my mother. I just nodded in reply.

"She's right, you know," Alice said.

I shot her a dark look and left the room.

What now?

_**--Evan's POV--**_

I wasn't eavesdropping, I just happened to hear this boy talk. He does have a rather loud voice. From what I saw, he must be close to Bella.

Will he be a problem too? I already have this Edward in my way; I don't need any more obstacles.

I made a promise to myself that this _Jacob _would not get in my way.


	15. Chapter 14: Candles Sick&Tired

**Hey everyone!**

**Did you guys really thing I totally forgot about this story? Nope. No siree. I did not. I have been so busy with school. I was disabled from the computer due to failing grades (don't worry, I got all A's for my first half semester report card…aren't you proud of me?! I brought an F to an A, I should get myself some Reeses and cupcakes…) but anyways, I finally have a free weekend from homework and etc. So, I hope you enjoy the chapter. Will try to update tomorrow also!**

**--xoxo; jenners--**

Chapter 14:

Candles (Sick&&Tired)

_**--Edwards POV--**_

_Somebody turn the lights on,_

_Somebody tell me what's wrong,_

_I'd be lying if I told you,_

_Losing you was something I could handle,_

_Somebody turn the lights on,_

_Somebody tell me how long,_

_All this darkness will surround you,_

'_Cause I'm burning for you,_

_Burning like a candle_

_Burning for you,_

_Burning like a candle,_

_Burning for you,_

_Burning like a candle_

I lay on the couch like a stone as I listen to my ipod. "Candles (Sick And Tired)" by _The White Tie Affair _streamed through my headphones. I close my eyes and contemplate. I picture Bella in my head. I smile at the sight of her in my head. Chocolate brown eyes, soft brown hair, and such the sweetest scent in the world. My stone body calls out for her.

I need Bella. I need to feel her fragile body clinging tightly to mine. I _need _her. I _thirst _for her. I need her to warm up the cold heart contained in this dead body. I need her to fix me. **Right. Now. **I yearn for her…I am burning for her. Just like a candle.

_**--Bella's POV--**_

I was laughing heartedly as Jacob and Evan goofed off. This was a perfect day to be outside in the sun and hanging out with my best friends.

To make it complete and one of the most perfect days ever was if Edward was here. But he isn't, and I can't let that get to me. I push the thought away from me, not wanting to harsh my mellow.

Two Jacob look-alikes came out of his house, looking as if they had just woken up. They were huge. They were tall and buff. Not to mention scary looking.

"Bella, Evan, these sleepyheads are Quil and Embry," Jacob said as he fist bumped them both.

"Hey," they both said in unison.

"Hi," I replied, "what's up?"

"Nothing much," said Quil, grinning from ear to ear for some reason. "Jacob you pick 'em good," he added winking at me. I blushed and I looked over at Jacob, who was also blushing but not meeting my eye.

"So, what should we do now?" asked Evan. "I'm bored to death," he added.

"Let's go see a movie, there's nothing more like buttery popcorn covered in cheddar and action moving on the big screen," said Embry.

"A movie it is," said Jacob grinning. "Bella, you don't mind us using your truck, do you?" he asked.

"It's no problem, let's get going, "I said.

As I walked to the car, I thought to myself: This is the first step of moving on…

_**--Evan's POV--**_

I will have to kill Jacob. I did not know he had feelings for Bella. Bella will forever be mine. I will NOT let her slip through my fingers just like that. She is _**mine.**_


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